Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
