Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
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