Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
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