thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
