Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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