but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
I just sucked dick on a ferry
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize