Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
Randomize
