I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
I heard we made out
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
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