What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
I believe in your delicious
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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