Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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