Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
Randomize