i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
Every concussion has its silver lining
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
