is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
