nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
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