Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
My pussy is not your playground.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize