dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
