After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
