If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
Randomize
