i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize