I must be too annoying 4 u.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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