I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
