Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Randomize
