What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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