you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
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