Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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