My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Randomize
