My Higher Power is John Stamos
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
The air was thick with penises
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
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