Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
