can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize
