Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
Randomize