Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
