then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Randomize
