We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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