Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize