This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Randomize
