Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize
