My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
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