Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
The Olympian is in my bed
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
