It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
