Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
I'm at a crab and wine festival with my dad. He just introduced me as his girlfriend to all of his co-workers. I am so drunk I thought he was serious.
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Randomize
