Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
I'm currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
just to let you know, that was probably the funniest text i've ever received.
I suppose that kind of helps fill the void where my self respect used to be.
Randomize
