Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize
