Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
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