How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Randomize
