Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
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