with your own penis?
god i wish i could take a shit and a shower at the same time
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
Randomize