In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
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