i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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