Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
Randomize