She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
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