How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
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