we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize