whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
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